Characters in the Cosmos: Meet Gwylm Baraka
Introducing Mr. Gwylm Baraka, a character from Christian Mercer's working titled manuscript, Musagmin. Mercer is currently querying his novel and looking for representation.
Who are you? What do you do?
Who am I? You serious? I’m Gwylm Baraka that’s who I am, CEO of Baraka Corporations.
What is your greatest fear?
My greatest fear is that them weak-willed liberals’ll in the Whitehouse will tell the world what’s coming. Now, if that transpires, they’ll be stampedes. The ranch gates’ll be open and all the formalities of building a safe haven will be stopped in its tracks. Mankind won’t have two cents to rub together when Musagmin steams into harbor.
What's the worst thing that's happened in your life?
Now the day my old man upped and passed away’s gotta be the worst thing ever happened to me.
What did you learn from it?
Now, what I learnt was that a man’s legacy is the responsibility of his children. Here I was, the captain of the greatest company you’ve ever seen, an institution founded on helping people better their situation, and it was all down to me. Oh sure, I had my brother, but he soon decided to pursue other stuff. I learnt duty from that time; duty to my poppa and to those under me.
What or who is the greatest love of your life?
Are you yanking my goddam chain? Romance, flowers, chocolates, all that Men are from Mars stuff? We’re years from the Rapture, I’ve no time for that. Now when the danger’s past, and I’m running things, it’ll be a different story. Some lucky little lady’s gonna be Mrs Baraka. Such a girl’ll be perfect for standing by my side as I shepherd those who survive into a new society.
When and where were you happiest?
When I first met Einstein and had him work for me. We did some real great stuff together. Eventually, he began to think he was the only piece of fancy hardware in my inventory, but until that day, we had a fine old time, making money, discovering the amber…
What is your most treasured possession?
Now, it ain’t my helicopter, my Ferrari, or my houses. It ain’t even this here Rolex here. What do you say to that? This here painting’s my most treasured thing. Tower of Babble, they call it. Some museum in Vienna gave it me for safe-keeping so it doesn’t get trashed with everything else in the world. Makes me think, looking at it. All that work, how did someone get people to bust their backs like that?
What do you most value in your friends?
I ain’t got time for those mouthy types who are all hat and no cattle. Now, in my opinion, a friend is someone who’ll help you. Who can, and who will. Mutual progress is the foundation, the core of what business is all about.
Tell me about your best friend. How did you meet? What do you like about this person? What do you think they like about you?
George Houseman’s the fella. In 2013, he signed a major contract for Baraka Industries to save the world. Now, he knew about Musagmin because of one of those fancy-pants computers we sold him, but we’d already worked that out courtesy of some ancient inscription. I like the fact he knows good leadership material; even fixing to goddam shake on it. Yeah, he’s my representative before the high and mighty of the political world, is that guy and his faith in me won’t go unrewarded.
What's the worst thing you've ever done to someone? Why?
Only a few million will survive Musagmin, and only two million even know it’s fixing to weed-
whack us, so you could say, I’m guilty by association. But what am I supposed to do? Build an ark? Tie a goddam lasso round it? My corporation helped seal off the Arctic so we could prepare, it built technology to monitor people better so we could keep things nice and under the table. With all due respect to those who disagree with that, let’s see if you’re fixing to hang around outside when the world ends.
What is your ideal world?
When I look at this here picture of the Tower of Babble, I reflect inside on what such a world would have conducted itself. How nice and neat it must have been to have a single leader like that, just getting stuff done. Now Houseman knows that when all is done, and I’ve got my own bit of real estate, that’s the kinda bread I’ll bake for y’all. That’s why he’s fueling my rockets and flying my flag. That’s why you should too.
You can find Christian Mercer on Facebook and Twitter: @ChrisMercerWrit.